Finally, all of these monsters are out the door, and I'm left to my own devices. I hardly recognize this feeling of not being behind the eight ball anymore, and I know another one of sorts is headed my way, but for a minute here I'm in control.
All of my "professional" energy for the next four months will be diverted toward my new journey, which will be over before I know it. I'm teaching some new classes soon, but everything else will be focused on my little exhibit for Rare Device in May. Rare Device, where I magically turn into my most eccentric, weird self the second I walk in the door. Why is that? Am I manifesting some strange idea I have of myself as an artist? I have no idea, but that's certainly not who I want to be. Nerves, maybe.
Anyway, if I'm being honest, this is a bit of a dream come true for me. A list of selfish dreams:
Dream two: farm/garden/fields/space/studio
Dream three: dress beautifully/fit into my old clothes
It is just an exhibit of giant flowers (and some new ideas I can't wait to start), well time-constricted because I've already eaten up half of January with my last commission and some miserably failed prep work, but to me it feels like some sort of independent study thesis project. The trick is to find where craft and art intersect, or maybe I find they never do, or that it doesn't matter. And to be sure not to superimpose meaning over what just might be something pretty to look at.
I have some ideas, so we'll see.